Oh woe is me! I have been left alone in the darkness! Cut off from civilisation! The years of undying faithfulness have been thrown back in my praying face!
I can´t connect to Google!
What shall I do? How can I continue with my lifeline hacked through and thrown back into the ocean of uncertainty? How shall I answer those daily questions of necessity such as "Who was that song You´re So Vain really about?"
Google is my link to knowledge and understanding. It is Dr Google in times of pain; Wiseman Google in times of suffering; Brother Google who answers those questions of religon and faith. It is Telephone Book Google, Old Friend Google, Boredom Fighter Google, General Knowledge Google, News Google, Put-the-name-to-a-face Google.
Oh Google, why have you left me?
Please, please, please get it up again quickly. My fragile soul cannot endure this much longer.