Monday, August 18, 2008

Sweaty, stinky and half deaf... ahhhh

I know you're all desperate to find out what my tweet meant the other day. For those who don't follow me, here it is:

Got caught on a shipwreck in berlin by the water police. knuckles are now rapped.

However you're all going to have to wait a bit longer because I want to just quickly mention that I had a FUCK'N ROCK'N weekend at the Highfield festival.

Yes, DrH and I teamed up once again with PermanentHoliDave in what has now become an annual ritual of German music festivals. This time around we dragged along SuperCoolMatti and instead of heading all the way down to the Nürburgring for Rock Am Ring, we went to Erfurt for the Highfield festival.

This was the basic lineup:

*Hans, where's the beer?*
*No Camping here, Sir*
*1000 PortaLoos*
*Tinned Sausages with Runny Eggs*
*3 Days Showerless*
*Am I Too Old For This*
*Nope (Thank God)*

As you can see, an arse kicking weekend. I shall now go and grab one of the left over beers and await my turn for the shower.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

I Google You

Amanda Palmer (Dresden Dolls) singing, lyrics by Neil Gaiman.

The modern day stalker.

Monday, August 11, 2008

Dirty knees - All the feathers - All the threes - Gertie Lee - Two little fleas - Sherwood forest (all the trees)

That's me!

I woke up this morning in the tiny wedge of space we call a bed in the Bulli, my husband next to me and my dog whining to be let into the bed and I thought "Yep, SOME things I've managed to do pretty well so far."

I suppose it's unsurprising that a birthday leads to quite a bit of reflection on the life led till now. I've often compared myself to those who seem to have it all together: the house, the kids, the good car, the impressive job. And of course I come up lacking. I mean, dude, I own a shitty bicycle and a limited edition signed Geiger print. I rent, have a dog and I've thrown in the impressive-sounding job.

But this past year I've found myself, through my writing group and other creative pasttimes, hanging out with more people like me. People who haven't achieved those goals and have a great, impressive, exciting life.

And I think "Yep, at 33 I LIKE me. And my life."

Wednesday, August 06, 2008


I have nightmares. I thought I'd mentioned them here before, but apparently not. Generally they're pretty bad, most of the time they happen in the first 30 minutes of sleep, often I stop breathing and always I have to wake myself up by concentrating on wiggling my toes. I taught myself that trick in high school.

I also completely rock the recurring dream style. Through most of highschool it was a dream about returning to the school as an adult with a few other women. We'd pull up at the gate in a white car, grab our walkie-talkies and disappear into the school grounds at night. What happened in between always varied - once I walked into the gym where a class was going on, once I went back to the car and found that the boot was full of dead bodies folded like shirts - but it always ended with the others dropping off the walkie-talkies and me eventually being grabbed from behind.

Ahh, teenage angst. Dontchya just love it?

I've had several other notable recurring dreams over the years, but none as good nor as longlived. That went a couple of times a week for several years. I still do some great stand-alone ones though.

Anyway I've noticed a bit of a trend - these dreams only become nightmares when one character starts getting out of control. I'll be in a situation, like last night where I was with a group of kids showing off their karate kid moves, and one person will just start acting completely inappropriately. In this case it was a guy who turned into an adult and then started getting violent. It isn't the whole dream that's nightmarish, just one character. And they ALWAYS started off nice. They start behaving oddly, it gets worse and suddenly it's a nightmare and I'm fighting to breathe.

That's the point when the real panic sets in because I try desperately to wake myself up, something I can only do if I force myself into calmness and concentrate on wiggling my toes. Which, incidentally, I'm not doing in reality just the same as I haven't actually screamed myself hoarse although my throat still feels like it.

You know, I was aiming to make this post kind of light-hearted and funny, like "check out this weird shit my brain does when it's shutting down", but it turns out I can't.

Even though I'm used to them and know how to deal with them - hell, I even know when I'm going to have one because I fall asleep in a different way - they are horrid. And mostly I manage to fall asleep again by remembering my mother coming into my room when I was about six and had had an awful nightmare (about spiders, and when she sat on my bed a giant spider sat on my legs in my dream) and she brushed my forehead and told me to think about butterflies.

So that's what I do.

Monday, August 04, 2008

german tweets

A week ago I went along to the first ever German twitter reading (Twitterlesung), and met up with jenna_ in what felt remarkably like a blind date, where I stared nervously at all tall brunettes hoping for a small signal that they were the one I was waiting for. Perhaps I should have worn a red rose in my lapel.

Anyway we met up and had enjoyable evening despite the presenters best attempts to make it cliqueish and self indulgent. The first presentation - A day in the life of Twitter - was hilarious, but after that it was just people admiring themselves and each other's ability to be clever in 140 characters.

If you do want to watch the first presentation here's a video . The funny bit is between 111 minutes and 88 minutes (the timing only seems to exist backwards there) and it is of course all in German. Here are a few gems which stuck with me though:

*Das Homeoffice ist der Tod der Körperpflege.

*Mir ist schon wieder beim Radfahren der Penis eingeschlafen. Aber fürs aufwachkribbeln lohnt es sich.

*Ich hab mein Schnitzel in Auto vergessen.